Permission Slips
Give Yourself Permission
Somewhere along the way into adulthood, many of us absorbed a dangerous belief: “I can’t do ______.” or perhaps, “It would be selfish if I did what I really want.”
Maybe you find yourself relating to other hazardous beliefs such as rest is lazy. That saying no means we’re letting someone down; or that we have to earn our own attention, care, or even rest. That if you allow yourself a chance to rest that you’re really just rotting in bed.
But here's the truth: you're not a machine. You’re not a to-do list. You’re a human being. And you deserve to be ON your own to-do list. Your needs and wants matter too. Sometimes the biggest barrier is to give ourselves permission to ____ (rest, take care of ourselves, add us to the to-do list, say “no” be playful, sleep in, not know it all, not DO it all, leave the dishes in the sink for the night, etc.) is the belief that we can’t give ourselves permission. The good news is we don’t need permission from anyone else to take care of ourselves, just your own. As adults we get to give ourselves permission, but sometimes we need to learn that we can in fact give ourselves permission for what we want.
The Myth of “Handling It All” - Machine Mindset
Adulthood often gets painted as this relentless hustle of responsibilities—careers, families, bills, deadlines, relationships, errands, and expectations piled high, while not looking like we are stressed. The people who “handle it all” without complaint are celebrated. This becomes the aspirational goal for many. But underneath that applause is often a whole lot of burnout, resentment, emotional exhaustion and discontentment.
Giving yourself permission to rest, say no, slow down, or ask for help isn’t a weakness or any negative reflection of your moral character. It’s an act of emotional maturity. It’s what it means to be human. A solid reminder that you matter just as much as everything and everyone else in your life.
You Don’t Have to Earn It
One of the biggest hurdles adults face is this deeply ingrained idea that self-care has to be earned. That we can only rest once the list is complete. That we can only feel joy if everything else is under control.
But the list will never be fully done. Life doesn’t hand out gold stars for self-neglect. You’re allowed to take care of yourself simply because you exist. You’re allowed to feel good. You’re allowed to take up space.
Give Yourself The Green Light
So here’s your reminder, in case you need it: you are allowed to take care of you. You’re allowed to make choices that support your well-being, even if it disappoints someone else. Even if the laundry isn’t folded. Even if it means doing less instead of more.
Give yourself that permission. Not just once, but over and over again. Because the most beautiful act of self-care you might do today is be kind to yourself.
Giving yourself permission holds profound psychological and personal power. Here's why:
1. Authenticity and Self-Alignment
When you give yourself permission, you're affirming that your desires and needs are valid. You’re living in alignment with who you truly are, not who you think you're supposed to be. This breeds authenticity, which leads to deeper confidence and clarity.
2. Freedom from External Validation
Instead of waiting for approval from others, you become your own authority. That shift can be incredibly freeing as it reclaims your agency and reduces dependence on others' opinions.
3. Reduced Internal Conflict
Many people struggle with inner dissension, guilt, or fear around doing what they truly want. Granting yourself permission can quiet those internal critics, making space for action, peace of mind, and meaning in life.
4. Increased Motivation and Energy
Acting from true desire is energizing. You’re not forcing yourself through obligation or fear—you’re moving because you want to. That kind of motivation is more sustainable and effective over the long term.
5. Creativity and Growth
Following what you genuinely want often leads to experimentation, exploring, and discovery. It’s where personal growth and creative breakthroughs tend to happen.
6. Boundaries and Self-Respect
Giving yourself permission also involves saying “no” to what you don’t want and “yes” to what you do want. Aligning your boundaries of yes and no with your values leads to increased self-respect and, again, greater self-confidence.
Giving yourself permission is an act of reclaiming power. It’s not about selfishness, it’s about recognizing that honoring your truth is a necessary foundation for a meaningful, fulfilling life.
